Things NEVER to Do in Baby Showers
We've come a long way from charades. Now, there are shelves full of games specifically designed for adults. Some of these games, as you can imagine - or might have even enjoyed yourself a time or two - are of the… er…well, they can be a bit racy. And they can ask awkward questions and inspire awkward moments; because that's part of the fun of the game.
Now, you simply don't want the word “awkward” to be anywhere near your baby shower. In fact, you want to keep awkward at least 500 feet away from your baby shower at all times. So to help do this, ensure that the games you choose are suitable for everyone and won't lead to awkward situations.
Also, think even further than whether the game itself is intended for “adults only”. Some games, like Twister, aren't typically enjoyed by people who may be obese, or who are afflicted with a physical limitation.
For example, if one of your guests is confined to a wheelchair, then having a game that requires mobility - like Twister, or a rousing rendition of musical chairs - can be very awkward. It can actually inspire hurt feelings.
Naturally, you can't be expected to plan ahead for every eventuality. You won't know, for instance, that one of the guests had a very traumatic piƱata experience as a child, and therefore runs out of the room screaming when she sees one of them flying through the air. So what should you do when you can't know everything that there is to know?
Simple: just have a few options. Keep a few back-up games handy, just in case you detect that people are uncomfortable with the choices. It sounds like a little thing, but it can truly make the difference between keeping awkward at bay, or having it crash the baby shower.
Things NEVER to Do: Don't Ask People to Eat Standing Up
Some people like eating while standing up; particularly kids, who always seem to be on the go and ready to do the next.
To Gift Registry or Not to Gift Registry
This is another one of those fun decisions that involve the mother-to-be, and probably the father-to-be, as well. Gift registries are, generally speaking, wonderful inventions because the conveniently solve a lot of potentially confusing problems, such as:
· What will the parents-to-be want as a gift?
· What gift items have already been purchased by other invitees?
· What price range is appropriate?
So with all of this evidence in favor of gift registries, why might someone not use one? Well, there are few reasons.
The simplest reason is one of preference. Some people simply don't want to limit the range of things that guests might buy; especially if some gifts aren't typically found in stores that offer registries. For example, some artistic guests may want to create something for the baby; perhaps wooden mobile, or a beautiful picture to hang in the baby's room.
These kinds of items, by definition, can't appear on a gift registry; and so parents-to-be might wish to avoid using one.
Another reason is one of cost. Depending on the number of people invited to the baby shower, and presuming that those that have been invited attend, there may be a slight awkwardness if the registry contains gift possibilities that might frankly be outside of a person's price range. This can indeed be awkward.
For example, if 20% of the gifts in the registry are below, say, $30, there is some possibility that these ones will be snatched up first; thus leaving a latecomer to buy something more expensive, or risk buying something that isn't on the registry at all and therefore might not be wanted by the parents.
To help deal with this situation, it's possible for you (as the organizer) for informally recommend that people band together to buy certain bigger ticket items, like a crib or a stroller. In this way, people can still stay within their budget limitations, yet purchase something that the parents want, and indeed, need (since babies can be very expensive!).
Remember, of course, that if you choose the registry route, that you provide all the necessary details. It may also be wise to include your phone number if anyone has any questions about gifts or the registry.
How To Go About Sending Out Baby Shower Invitations
A good rule of thumb here is to work with the mother (and ideally, the father) to-be in order to decide who should attend, and who should be left off the list. This is a delicate scenario and can cause a number of minor headaches (even some major ones).
The problem is, simply, that while it would be ideal to invite everyone who would want to attend, that's just not practical; either economically, or simply in terms of planning. Ultimately, decisions will have to be made, and if you can work with the parents-to-be to make these decisions, the chances of making wise ones will increase.
Once you've figured out who to invite - and this process can take a few days of thinking and re-thinking - the next step is to send out the invitations. Ensure that you do this well in advance of the baby shower. There are two major reasons for this.
Firstly, you want to give your invitees enough lead time to that if they do have something planned on the baby shower date that they can, if they wish, move those plans in order to attend. If you don't provide them with enough notice, even if they want to change their existing plans, they might not be able to.
Secondly, you want to give people enough time to RSVP (i.e. confirm their attendance). Some people are not the most organized people in the world, and as such they might not RSVP right away. As such, you want to give them a bit of time to get to this on their ever-growing TO-DO list.
Now, there's another issue here that we should discuss. Some people think, or just assume really, that if you don't RSVP, that means you aren't attending. That's actually not technically correct. RSVP doesn't mean (even in the French language from where it comes) that someone is going to attend. It simply means: please get back to me on this.
When The Baby Shower Should Happen
This is an important question to ask, and of course, to answer. And as usual, there are a few different viewpoints on when to hold the baby shower. Fortunately, however, these views aren't as debatable as they sometimes are when it comes to whether a relative or non-relative should hold the baby shower (as we discussed above). So don't worry; this is a rather easy and straightforward challenge to solve.
Now, the real problem here is simply that there isn't a clear answer to the question: when should the shower happen? The answer to this will almost always depend on factors that are specific to the mother-to-be, the guests, and other issues.
So rather than providing a “one-size-fits-all” answer here - which is something that we can't do without knowing the details of your particular baby shower - let's just look at the variables. Once you know these, you'll easily be able to determine when the baby shower should be held.
The Mother-to-Be
Let's start with mother-to-be. She may have a preference about when the shower should be held; and this preference should be heeded. The father-to-be might also provide input here, which is wonderful and should be part of the overall decision-making process (we take a closer look at “couples” baby-showers later on in this book).
What kinds of things might influence a mother-to-be's preference on when the shower should be held? Some of them prefer to have the shower when they're showing; they may feel that there's something more appropriate (for lack of a better word) about holding a shower when people can actually see that a baby is on the way.
In practical terms, this means that a shower might be held well into the second trimester, or into the third.
Planning The Baby Shower
There's an ongoing debate - that can actually become quite emotional and vocal - that tried to determine whether or not a relative should throw the baby shower. Traditionally, the view has been that a relative should not throw a baby shower, because it can appear that the relative is requesting gifts. Yet traditions change, and there are times when a sibling, or a cousin, or an aunt might be the ideal and somewhat convenient choice.
So what should you do? To answer this, we can respond with the best, and sometimes most unsatisfying answer of them all: it depends.
Sorry, but it really does depend. If you hail from a rather traditional or conventional background, it may be wise to see that a non-relative is in charge of the baby shower. In addition, even if you, personally, are comfortable with a relative throwing the baby shower, some of your guests - who may be less comfortable with it than you - may object (or just whisper about it behind your back).
Use your judgment here. Perhaps the most practical advice is this: if you can conveniently and pleasantly not have a relative run things, then that will likely be the best route to go. However, if that's just not possible, plausible, or preferred, then don't feel like you're someone from outer space because you're related to the mother-to-be. More and more people are breaking with tradition; especially since they feel that the perception of a relative “asking for gifts” arguably doesn't exist anymore.
Gifts (which we talk about further on in this book) are rather integral to baby showers; it's quite hard to imagine one without gifts. Since that is the case, whether a relative requests them from those attending the baby shower, or a non-relative requests them, arguably isn't important to those attending. They're likely focused on what the baby shower should focus on: the mother-to-be, and a wonderful opportunity to share in her joy.
Crochet Tools And Materials
Many crochet instructors will say that all you need to get started are your hook and ball of yarn, but you really need more than these. We gave you the parts of a hook and the different sizes, but we'll get into more detail here, as it is the “star” tool of any crocheting project. If there were no hooks, there would be no crochet.
Hooks
We've already mentioned that sizes of hooks vary from thin to thick. The thin steel hooks are used with fine cotton yarn, but the bigger ones are used for heavy wools and synthetic fibers.
Hooks are made of steel, aluminum, bone or plastic.
When doing a project from a pattern, the one who wrote the pattern will suggest a hook size, but you should be a better judge of what hook to use. Use the one you're most comfortable with and the one that will help you achieve the correct gauge for a pattern.
As you go along with your work, you may have to change hooks more than once. The essential thing when choosing a hook brand is to go with the one you work well with and that feels good on your hand. Crocheting enthusiasts buy their hooks based on the following factors: hand size, finger length, weight of the hook, and preference for aluminum or plastic.
There is no fixed formula for choosing the ideal size hook. Remember that crocheters are different. Some like to crochet tightly, some loosely, so that this makes it difficult to determine a formula. Use gauge as the key consideration - how many stitches you need to do to make an inch.
As the experts say, practice makes perfect. Experimenting is even better. If you're using a plastic hook for a particular project and you're having problems, switch over to an aluminum hook and see how that feels. In time, you'll pick your favorites and know which sizes or types give you the best results with the best feel.
